Blob

In church yesterday, we were looking at what is called 'The Blob Tree':

Our challenge was to look at where we felt we were spiritually in terms of following after the purposes of God and where we desired to be.

Which one do you feel like?

This is how I felt:

The person desperately grabbing onto, clinging onto the tree…a little way up there, but with so much still left to climb.

Situations in the past six months have seen me worry about finances, wonder about our future family, wish for healing for our current family, wistfully hope for a future job.

My hands raw and blistered from just trying to cling onto this tree, something stronger than me.

Barely surviving. Just about holding on.

My favourite part of my birthday is the cards/messages I receive. The narcissistic side of me wants to know what people think of me. But the sensitive and probably slightly insecure part of me wants, no, needs to be affirmed by words. Needs to feel the love, especially when far from home, that I am cared about, considered and matter in this world.

“Thank you for being you. Someone who refuses to settle for anything less. For fighting the good fight with the right gloves on, and for patiently waiting for the right ring to step into. I’m one of many in your corner. I truly believe in you!”

“It’s been an encouragement to us to watch you really support and love Steve through this rough time! You’ve really been a great role model.”

“I cannot thank you enough for the impact you had on my life.”

“You are the most enthusiastic person we know. You love everything and everyone.”

“Thank you for all your constant words of wisdom! You’ve spoken loads into my life and helped this young man grow!!”

“Although I don’t really know you, I know that you are so gifted in writing and having so much fun with friends and you are so full of love and joy!”

“You challenge and inspire me to be more just by being who you are.”

And my favourite:

“I know that you are in an awkward stage in your life, but I just want to say that it is no mistake that you don’t have a job. I honestly have seen you change more these past few months than over the past few years. You are in just the place God wants you to be in.”

When you look back at the blob tree, at the person I picked, you notice something special:

Beneath the clinging yellow blob, is another blob.

Streching an arm upwards

Looking for a way to get higher

Needing help to get to the next level

And in the frantic desperate clinging of the yellow blob, the green blob notices something that they want, something that they aspire to, something that they want to be a part of.

People are messy. And it isn’t restricted to the peeing, pooping and puking stages of our infant years.

It is unleashed into the emotional turmoil of relationships, the financial craziness of being a “grown-up”, the frustrating tangling of not being the person, not having the character we want to have right now.

But somehow despite that being messy, despite each feeling as if we don’t have all our stuff sorted out, we look to oneanother

For help.

Solace.

Guidance.

Support.

Words of affirmation.

We are not just blobs, fatty messes, with an indistinct form. We are not blobs of ill-defined shapes.

We are blobs, spots that make a mark on this world.

That make a difference.

That in a word, deed, action could profoundly impact someone’s life without even realizing.

That are used by Father God to bring love and hope to others.

He is not ignorant of the miserable mess of our lives.

Rather, He uses us in spite of our messiness.

You, little yellow blob, are important to the tree.

Together

I hate being alone. 


I know hate is a strong word, but I really don't like it. Yes, we should be able to embrace quiet time, and learn to be still and silent, but I am part of the generation of people like Elizabeth Gilbert (protagonist in 'Eat, Pray, Love') that cannot learn to just be still and mediate in the position of a bridge, board, or other random inanimate object.

I need people!! I need noise!!

Another reason why Ghana is the best place in the world for me.

Under one five-bedroomed roof live twenty-two of us, ranging from 14-40, from seven different countries [Ghana, Togo, Germany, England, Mexico, America & Northern Ireland]. There is a frequently sung the song, "There were four in the bed and the lile one said, 'Move down because another apprentice just got accepted so we need to make room for them!'". With water problems for two days, toilets were full of everything from every orifice. Meals around the 8-seater table are a diving event of hands, food and madness. People sit on each others laps and the arms of the chair as we gather around the tv.

Yet there are no complaints. 

I said it yesterday, and I will reiterate it again: It takes a special type of person to give up the comfort of their western life and live in Africa.

And it is these special people who will change the world. 

I love the late night chats, the hanging out, the communal meals, the trips to the store that don't require ten people to go, but everyone is enjoying hanging out so much they can't break away.

Steve was yesterday's hero for fixing the water. The shower off our room is the best one in the house, so I offered whoever wanted to use it the opportunity to do so before we settled down for the night. After the final person finished, they mopped up the bathroom not wanting to leave it dirty for us.

At lunchtime, whether you have put money in the pot or not, bread, ham tongue and overpriced cheese are shared and passed around the table.

A toilet is cleaning thoroughly even though you weren't the one to repeatedly throw up in it.

This is what it means to be together.
To have community.
To live out the body of Christ.

It is not just in the words we say to encourage one another, or the polished preach we proclaim, but in the acts we serve one another with.

"This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples-when they see the love you have for each other."
{John 13:35 - the message translation}

I love the loudness of this house. The only moment of silence in the house is when "internet time" happens (for just one hour a day) and all the "foreigners" gather around their laptops to update their Facebook statuses, blogs and check emails.

The irony of a internet-based virtual community replacing human tangible connections.

There is no greater joy to me than this.
This togetherness.
This love.
This hope.

I imagine Father God loves it. 
Revels in it.
Takes joy and pride in us, His creation, fulfilling the purpose He desired us to have.

And I imagine how when it is released into the schools and the communities, the great impact it will make. 

People

Our first day of teaching training…yet I am the one learning so much…

The day started at 7am, meeting with the team leaders for extra training. 8:15 we met to start Haverim devotions (Pais’ new way of studying scripture daily as a team based on PaRaDiSe teaching & principles from Talmidin) outside in the courtyard – what amazes me is a cliché, but none the less a valid point – people are people no matter where they are from: Ghana, England, America, Germany, Togo, Germany…we all desire to learn more, and share ideas and thoughts on the word of God. 

As we worshipped and prayed together as the rain gently patted onto the corrugate iron roof, I couldn’t help but smile as I looked around and heard their voices raise, desperate to see God move this year in the lives of the people of Accra. As we sang “God of this City” we declared what we wanted to see happen – more students saved, a greater passion in this area, truth brought to these people….

Today’s sessions were:

-       Kingdom Principles: “Rubbish In, Rubbish Out” – Paul Gibbs (via video)

-       Schools: Delivery – Gail Whittaker

-       Apprenticeship: FriendRaising – Sebrina Miller

-       Apprenticeship: Mistakes & Lesson – Steve Miller

Everyone is keen to write down notes but not everyone had resources. Several of the Ghanaian team members were scribbling notes into abandoned diaries/calendars; one was even writing in the blank pages back of George Foreman’s autobiography! So 10 (of the 210!!) notebooks we collected as school supplies for the students were given out to apprentices – glad we brought as many as we did!!

Following the sessions, we were taken on a tour of the surrounding area. Despite being in the capital city, there is such a disparity between the wealth of the malls, modern stores, university and large houses surrounding the airport, and the clay red path and shack huts just a half hour away. Our guesthouse, one of the best in the city, is occasionally without water and electricity yet we just get on. The endurance of the apprentices, even the western ones, is astounding – it takes a very special type of person to be willing to live this uncomfortable life, but a life that is essential to be led in order to bring the gospel to these students.

As we strolled around the backstreets, led by the Ghanaian apprentices and support staff, random children shouted “obruni” (white person) and “obini” (black person) – with my cardigan jauntily tied over my shoulders and skinny fit twisted jeans, I am called “obruni”. As they came towards us, some unexpectedly hugged us and all were desperate to have their picture taken – it seems everyone in the world wants to be “Facebook famous”.

Ben, one of the support staff from Royalhouse Chapel International, talked passionately and candidly about the needs of the people in this area. Most would be born, live, & die in this near poverty, never seeking to achieve more because they were without the hope of Jesus: this hope, Ben said, was they key, their way out.

A bigger vision of God gives you a bigger vision of yourself.

From Ghana to America, Germany to England, Togo to Mexico and beyond.

That’s what people need. 

Solo

For my birthday present, I got surprised with a trip to Florida (to see my friend Catharine Brindley from London compete in the Ironman 70.3 Triathlon AND to spend time with the Pais team there).

I flew FIRST CLASS!!

- Before any one wonders how we can afford that, the answer is we can't!! BUT because we fly standby, flights in America are the same price whether you fly coach/economy or first class...God is FANTASTIC (and that is a note all in itself for another time!!)

Standby rules meant I wasn't allowed to wear denim, shorts skirts or skorts (skirts and shorts combined). I thought my brown knee highs would look sophisticated but they only go with my jeans. In the end i picked a relatively sensible outfit, but topped it offwith a sweater pretentiously placed over my shoulders and tid in a Little Lord Fauntleroy/Prep School/Country Club manner. I discovered that my bag had a slit in it so you could slide it on the top of my small suitcase and look professional and like a well-seasoned traveller.

"Jaunty Fierce" best described me.

On my ticket was written 'Priority Access' so i got to go through another line while those in economy classes queued up.

The flight crew welcomed me more graciously then they had on my previous flights when I was slumming it.

I sat in seat by just ONE other person. Out arms never touched despite my fidgeting.

Our drinks orders were taken and arrived in real glasses.The orange juice tasted as if they had freshly squeezed the fruit from a beach that morning and then thoughtfully sieved to remove pips, bits and impurities that would impair taste.

Snacks were available for sale in coach. In First Debbie (who loved my accent) came and took my order on a stainless steal notepad. My omlette arrived accompanied by potato wedges, a fruit bowl and a lightly toasted bagel. I ate with real silverwear, savouring every morsel of this exquisite delight.

I was being treated like the princess I always knew myself to be.

Amidst this experience i kep thinking:

"I wish Steve was here!"

"Kaream would love flying in first class like this!"

"Jess and Jemma were so lucky when they got to fly first together!"

I had never felt so special.


Yet I had never felt so alone.


Experiences aren't that great when you don't have people to share them with. The moment was sophisticated and refined, but it would have been complete if the moment had been shared.

---

I spent the second half of the plane ride so engrossed in a conversation with the lady next to me, that we never exchanged names though we exchangedlife stories. We talked of healthcare, children, foreclosed houses, pets, flying, birds that were part of divorce settlements, nannies for children vs staying at home, church, quiliting and death.

She was alone.

I was alone.

Together we weren't.

---

On the shared shuttle ride to the hotel, a lady named Harlee who was travelling alone made this simple yet profound statement:

"Its always so much more fun when you can share it with someone!"

And that's the challenge for us all - to find someone fun to share it with. It's not about having a boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/child/best friend...its about appreciating and realising that the people that Father God has placed around you are not by chance, are not by accident...there is a plan and a purpose for them. They add to your life. There are experiences you will gain from them that you will not gain from anyone else. They are gifts they have that you are lacking so Father is blessing you by allowing you to learn from them. There are hard times that will remain hard but become bearable by leaning on those besides you. There are words that you will say, words that you will hear, that will change the very trajectory of your life, but you need to be around to be in that moment.

We can have the most amazing experiences, have the most beautiful clothes, have the best job...but if we don't have the right people around us...

In my first year on Pais, I was put on a team with two other boys who could not have been more different from me. I was pretty convinced it was a set up and after a day or so someone would come out and say "SURPRISE" and reveal my actual team to me.

But no one did.

And I think I've come to the place where I am glad they didn't.

There are challenges, conversations, prayers to God, situations that I went through in that first year that without the team I had, I would have never experienced. I was forced to grow and adapt in a way I wouldn't have chosen, but has shaped me into the woman I am today. There are apprentices on Pais that I can guide and encourage because I've been where they have been.

That team, those boys, those people shaped me into what I am today.

I wasn't better off alone.

Who has God arranged for you to be sat next to on the plane?? Nothing is by chance.

People help shape our lives...